Okay – I know what you’re thinking. Another bitter chick bitching about being single. Don’t get me wrong, we all know I may as well have eaten a bowl of lemons; it’s quite obvious that I’m bitter as hell. But please, read on, because that’s not where this is going.
Let’s put aside the fact that I’ve experienced multiple failed relationships (we’ll go into that later) in the past 5 years, and consider a few facts here:
1. Valentine’s Day is corny as hell.
I mean seriously..read the cards. It’s been a while since I was forced to celebrate this horrid holiday, so correct me if you’ve been successful in finding a card that doesn’t make you want to throw up.
That basically says it all. But for those of you who don’t know what that word means, I’ll expand.
Think outside the freakin’ red roses. Do something creative, something that’s less cliche. And I don’t mean go out and spend all of your money on a Tiffany’s bracelet. BE DIFFERENT. If we’re in a relationship (figuratively speaking), I’d like to celebrate OUR love with something unique, something personal. Not the same “I Love You” teddy bear that millions of other girls got.
3. That awkward new relationship.
“Do I get her something?” “What if he spends more than I do?” “What’s an appropriate gift for ‘we’re just getting to know each other’?”
Or that awkward moment when your potential partner got you something, and it slipped your mind. Woops. Sucks to suck.
4. The miscommunication.
Gents, how about when your lady friend says “Oh, you don’t have to get me anything…” And then she flips shit when all you got her was a card.. Trust me, I’m speaking from experience here – I’ve been THAT girl. Even if you have to default to the corny gifts, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT do absolutely nothing. As much as we say we don’t care, we’re lying.
5. You’re undervaluing your relationship.
All my friends who are happily married or content in their warm and fuzzy relationships, I’m not saying you guys aren’t absolutely PERFECT together… I’m not trying to get a bunch of hate mail for a V-Day post.
What I’m trying to say is this: If this is the one day a year that you’re celebrating your relationship, you’re doing it wrong. A functional, healthy, successful relationship should be celebrated 365 days of the year. Now, I’m not trying to say she needs a damn bear every single day. That’s just unrealistic, and kind of creepy.. It’s just that there are so many dysfunctional relationships these days, that if you’ve got a good one, that’s something you should celebrate as often as possible. Make sure you don’t forget how special it is to have this person in your life, and don’t take your relationship for granted. Because there are people like me, who can’t control their gag reflex from January 1st thru February 14th every time they turn on the radio, or walk into the grocery store.
I know you’re sitting there, thinking to yourself “Wow, no wonder she’s single.” Let me clear that up for you… I’m single because I choose to be single. At this point in my life, I don’t want to commit to another human being, and that’s my choice. But I must mention that I’d feel the exact same way if I did have a special someone.
Now that I’ve gotten THAT off my chest, I’m gonna go stress eat, hang out with my cat, and finish frosting my Valentine cupcakes. That’s about as festive as I get.